Trying to Blog again

So I am really a slacker in the blogging world. I am trying to make this thing pretty (something that must be done when you are as visually oriented as I am) and I just haven't had the time to sit down and figure it out. So I still have an ugly blog.

What's going on with the kids.... We ALL still have attachment issues. Nathan still doesn't completely trust that we are going to take care of him, and so therefore goes and does whatever the heck he wants when he wants. Hannah still lies through her teeth. I wonder when I will quit being angry at the people who hurt my children and stop dealing with all the fear based behaviours they placed in my childrens heart. And just get to love them freely without feeling as if I am untangling some big ol knot all the time. I wonder when Kade will learn to follow a schedule and actually show some responsibility for his schoolwork. I wonder when I will learn more patience and remember what it was like to be a child myself.

Since I have focused on my frustrations...here are some good things. Nathan actually knows what a primary color is and he knows the difference between Babylonians and Egyptians. His heart desires to do the right thing. He likes to do lots of different kinds of dives. And HE can follow a schedule.

Hannah likes to help me cook and can that girl do some dishes! She is a very good speller and reader. She too wants to do the right thing. She gets frustrated when she lies, and so maybe someday we won't be dealing with this anymore. She likes to swim and play puppies and house. She is kind hearted and when I was sick last week, she made a get well card. So sweet.

Kade is as kind as ever. Hormones have arrived in full force and he is argumentative about nothing. But that's okay. He is smart as a whip and makes me really proud when I think of all of the things he knows about at his age that I didn't have a clue about until my 20s and 30s. He likes to swim and discovered a love for roller coasters this summer. He is growing into a good, young man. He is a big help to his dad and most of the time is helpful without being asked.

I am much more patient than I used to be. So when I back up and look at things they aren't as big a deal as they seem in the moment. I know I should count my blessings, but today it seems as if i went through the list a little faster than normal. I just realized, I seem to blog when I am melancholy. Hopefully no one is reading this anymore because I sound like one big Eeyore!
God is good, life is hard.

Tomorrow I am sure will be another one of those great days, and I won't blog because I'll be so happy homeschooling and living my life. So sorry, but this is what it is today.

Kayla :)